Category Archives: Life

Confronting My Second Worst Fear

Life

Every parent’s worst fear is the death of their child. Every parent’s second worst fear is that they themselves will die, and leave their child to grow up without them.

Tonight I am confronted with a harsh reality no parent every wants to contemplate. I am watching my beautiful little girl swim in the fading sunlight, her happy little smile an image I want to hold tight in my memory. And I am thinking, what if something happened to me, and my beautiful little girl had to suddenly grow up without me?

This morning, four innocent people lost their lives in our quiet little city. Four people gunned down, two of them police officers. One of the police officers was Sara, a mother of three boys, a girl I first met as a child in school. Sara and the other victims will not get to go home to their children ever again. There will be moments missed, memories not made, and huge voids in lives that will never be filled.

There will be moments missed, memories not made, and huge voids in lives that will never be filled.

Every parent’s worst fear is the death of their child. Every parent’s second worst fear is that they themselves will die, and leave their child to grow up without them.

As my daughter swims and plays, she is thankfully completely oblivious to the dark events of today, or the unsettling thoughts lurking around in my head. And this is as is should be. No child should ever have to be burdened with the thought of losing their parents, and no child should ever have to be confronted with this reality, either. But it happens, every day, in the blink of an eye.

And no parent should ever have to be burdened with these thoughts, either. But when tragic things happen, you are suddenly forced against your will to confront the horrific realities of life. Mainly, that it is far too short, and precious moments are fleeting.

But when tragic things happen, you are suddenly forced against your will to confront the horrific realities of life. Mainly, that it is far too short, and precious moments are fleeting.

So I am going to watch my daughter swim and enjoy the look of sheer happiness on her face. I am going to try and soak in all the fleeting little moments of her life. I am going to try and make happy memories for her, so that if something ever happens to me, she can at least look back and smile when she thinks of our time together.

Because in the end, as parents, that is all we can really do.

Things I Want My Daughter to Know About Life

Life, ,

To my beautiful little girl,

I hope I am lucky enough to watch you grow up. I hope we get to experience all the highs and lows of life together, to soak up every experience possible.

Sometimes, though, life changes suddenly, and tomorrow is never guaranteed. Or we get so busy with day-to-day tasks that we forget to really talk and connect the way that we should.

So just in case I forget, or am not able to tell you later on, here are some things I want you to know as you navigate your way through life:

You alone are enough. You don’t need anyone or anything else to complete you.

Falling in love is one of the best – and worst – experiences in life. Don’t try to fight it or analyze it to death. You love who you love, whether it’s right or wrong. Just enjoy the journey and don’t worry about the destination.

Normal is boring. Different is colorful, vibrant, and a crazy fun ride. So be different, be unique, be weird. Let your freak flag fly. You will never, ever regret it – trust me.

“Normal is boring. Different is colorful, vibrant, and a crazy fun ride…”

Family is everything. Go and do what you need to do in life, but never lose touch with your family of origin. And never get so busy that you neglect to create a second chosen family for yourself – whether that means a husband and children, or a family of good friends.

To be successful in all areas of life, you need to be hard-working, fun, and kind. If you really pay attention, you will notice that the best people in life possess all three traits.

Money DOES buy happiness. Most people say the opposite is true, but if you are broke and in debt up to your eyeballs, you will be miserable. You don’t have to be rich to be happy, but you do need to make enough so that you can pay all your bills, put a little away, and still have room to treat yourself from time to time.

Do what you love, whether you get paid for it or not. A hobby may turn into a career, or it may not. Just find something that makes you sparkle inside, and find ways to fit it into your life as much as possible.

“Just find something that makes you sparkle inside, and find ways to fit it into your life…”

Live a life of no regrets. If you are not sure if you should do something, stop and ask yourself this question: If I don’t do this, will I regret it on my deathbed? If the answer is yes, then go for it.

You don’t need anyone’s permission to change. Change is vital and necessary in life to keep growing and moving forward. Surround yourself with people who support and encourage this, and remove people from your life who don’t.

Everyone is someone’s child. Therefore, everyone is the center of someone’s universe, and every life matters. Treat every person equally, and with dignity and respect. But also demand that others treat you the same in return.

Because you are the center of my universe, and always will be.